To make a French Legion of Honour
The Hull Packet (September 25, 1804)
The Gentleman's Magazine, LXXIV (October 1804) , p. 953 
Select some fit tools
From Philosophy's schools,
Well vers'd in the laws of submission;
Who can chatter, read, write,
Turn black into white,
Cheat, flatter, cajole, and petition.
Take mountebanks, prancers,
Fops, fiddlers, and dancers,
So volatile, versatile, nimble;
Pimps, parasites, spyers,
Apostates, rogues, liars,
State coblers; and knights of the thimble.
Take impious bravadoes,
Who laugh at religion so hearty;
Take infidel priests,
Half men and half beasts,
Staunch friends to the great Bonypartey.
Take pomp, pride, and puff,
White tinsel enough,
To gild, and to make them go down;—
Take treachery, knavery,
Rape, murder, and savage renown.
When this you have done,
Take folly and fun,
Gantheaume, Treville, and Arthur O'Connor.
Blend all in a mass,
And the mixture will pass,
For a modern French Legion of Honour!
1. The Gentleman's Magazine prints the poem with the signature "Hafiz," the pseudnym of Thomas Stott.