When It consider <has often occurred to me> of how much present interest & future advantage it would be to every respectable family if a domestic chronicle of every thing which concerns it were duly kept in every respectable family, comprizing not only such events as are usually registered in a blank leaf of the family bible, but every thing which concerns the interests of any of its members, & also all <those> great little event affairs which are in private life, what wars & changes of ministry xxxxx xxxxx are to a nation. In the course of a few generations such a record would be invaluable, & would justly be considered as the most precious of all heir–looms. Now tho it is far too late in life for th me to commence a register of this kind, I am disposed for there is one portion of it which may be supplied by recollection, imperfectly indeed, but sufficiently to preserve from entire forgetfulness things in themselves as worthy of remembrance as nine tenths of the battles, intrigues <broils &> mutations of which whereof history is composed. And therefore I sit down to compose as faithfully as my memory enables me a chronicle of the great little events which have occurred at Greta Hall since the birth of that daughter who was declared to be as ugly as a Dodo.

One of the Maids had a misfortune.

Derwent C., being then between three & four years of age swallowed seventeen shillings & sixpence for his amusement.

It was discovered by his telling his mother that he had eaten her two yellow shillings. Mrs C. came in great xxxx alarm to communicate it to me & my brother Henry then a student of medicine & Doctor–in–rus.

I remarked that this was xxxx work for a gold finder, – & the Student in medicine offered to farm the patient at half a crown a day, or sixpence a time, till the money should be recovered, – & moreover to be at all the expence of recovering it. Her fears were considerably relieved by this xxxx proposal, which however was not accepted. The money after making the grand tour of Derwents interior came into the world again next day

All the maids eloped xxx because I had turned a man out of the kitchen at eleven o clock on the preceding night. One of them was readmitted on the petition of her brother & her own acknowledgment of her fault. The wages of the other two up to that day were calculated, & distributed to the poor as forfeited by their misconduct

I bought a Donkey & named him John.

The garden had not then been made, & when John was called he would come galloping from the end of the field, braying for joy, & put his head in at the parlour window for a piece of bread at breakfast. Sometimes he walked into the room for it. As it was not possible to prevent the boys of this disorderly little town from abusing this poor Donkey we were obliged to part with it. M^r Spedding bought it; – & a few years afterward it died a natural death in the church yard; – but I apprehend of disease, & not of old age.

Sara fell into the mill race from a wooden bridge which stood then on this side the forge. Young Richardson

took her out of the water, just xx as the race had carried her into the river

The Great Itch

broke out in the family, being brought by R. L. from school.

Sad news arrived that Dapper had been hanged for sheepstealing

The flat roof being found very inconvenient because it let the rain in, a slate one was put on. The large timbers necessary for supporting it were carried up by xx William Bowness

on his back, – the most surprizing & most fearful feat of strength I ever witnessed, – for the weight seemed enough to have broken the ladder under him. I hardly need add that this Bowness was the strongest man in Keswick.

In the dead of the night we were awakened by hearing the kitchen window which is under our bedroom smashed in, – & this was followed by a similar crash in M^rs Wilsons bedroom. This was the greatest little event that ever befel us. In one minute all the household were in the long passage, – each running to the other to know what was the matter. I fired out of the window, – but in time only to let the culprits know that fire arms were kept ready. The next morning it was ascertained that a salted leg of mutton had been used as the instrument of mischief, – a piece of the fat adhering to the broken glass – the frames as well as windows were broken. We ascertained from which public house the drunken rioters had sallied, but nothing more. The Magistrates however met, & the Public houses were threatened unless they kept better hours. I sent the cryer round to give notice that if any persons were found late at night about these premises they must take the consequences.

Upon this it was debated at the Public Houses whether or not M^r S. had a right to shoot any body for coming about his house in the dark. I heard of this notable discussion & desired it might be made known, that if any body chose under such circumstances to stand fire, I would stand the law.

I deterred M^rs Coleridge from winning a sure sans prendre vole at Quadrille,

by laying my finger upon one of my own cards, & cautioning her against rashness.

The Doctor-in-rus & I meaning to cross the Stake,

on our way to Charles Lloyds, missed the pass, being the first time either of us had attempted it, – we got upon Bow Fell, agreed that he was a greater Bow than Beau Nash,

all-to-nothing, – or even Beau Brumhill; –

dined there with Duke Humphrey,

& got down into Langdale by a chimney much worse & ten times as long as that on Cawsey Pike.

On another occasion descending one of the Borrodale mountains we came to a place, where we were fain to slide over a holly bush into a beck. N.B. we were in thin summer pantaloons.

The Barn at Monk hall was burnt down.